Puppy Big Mess

Jasper, being a dog, is capable of doing some really gross things. This isn’t a dig against dogs – people do some pretty gross things, too. However, I had to deal with some particular foulness last weekend, and thought I’d share. Aren’t you lucky?

Last Sunday Hilary went off with her parents and Brynna for two days in Burlington for some obstetrics training her residency class was doing. Jasper and I were looking forward to at least two nights of being bachelors. I spend Sunday evening planning, purchasing for, and starting construction on some shelving for my workshop area in the basement.

Monday, as I was coming home from work, I was looking forward to another evening spent building stuff, without distractions or other conflicts. That ended about two seconds after I walked through the door, and caught the unmistakable odor that Jasper had had an accident. Our house is nearly all tile and hardwood-floored, save for an area rug in the living room, carpeting that remains in the guest room, and the foam tiles that line Brynna's floor. Guess where Jasper most enjoys making a mess? If it is vomiting, it'll be the area rug in the living room, bypassing the adjacent tiled kitchen and hardwood dining room. If it is the other end, it is almost certain to be Brynna's room. There must be something about those foam tiles that he really likes (or dislikes, who can say?).

So, fearing the worst, I went up to Brynna's room, and must have let out a tremendous Wilhelm scream when I saw what had happened. In multiple places, in multiple streaks and splatters, all but two tiles' worth of the floor was covered to some extend in excrement.

Let us just say that the next three hours were not pleasant. It involved the tub, and lots of scrubbing, and lots of bleach, which my hands a week later still smell of. It resulted in this fine pile of tiles set up to dry. I did pat myself on the back a little for my cleverness in the arrangement.


So, Monday evening was shot. Twice in the night, when I heard Jasper padding about with some rapidity, I let him out into the yard. I had the presence of mind Tuesday morning to close the doors to all the bedrooms before I left for work. Unfortunately, when I walked through the door Tuesday evening, my nose told me that his troubles (and my troubles) were not over yet. He had made another substantial mess, but at least this time it was along the second floor corridor. The hardwood floor was a lot easier to clean up. And just in time, too, because Hilary and the crew pulled in not long after I finished.

I heard Jasper wandering around with a quick step around 3 wednesday morning, and so went downstairs to let him out - just in case. Well, it didn't seem to work, because when I woke up at 5 he had managed yet another mess in the hallway I had scrubbed not twelve hours earlier. Poor puppy, poor me!

We did have a phone consult with the vet that morning, and some labs done to check for parasites, etc. It all came back clear, leaving us to guess what might have happened to him. Thankfully, Wednesday morning's mess appears to have been the parting shot, and we've been in the clear since then. We still keep him shut out of our rooms during the day, though.

[the title of this post comes to us courtesy of B. She got freaked out a few weeks back when she witnessed Jasper vomiting in the driveway. To this day, when I bring her home from daycare, she will invariably comment, with some trepidation, on “puppy big mess.” We scrupulously avoided explaining Jasper’s recent difficulties to her, particularly the part about him shitting all over her floor, or we’d never hear the end of it]